Monday was the fourth round of chemotherapy. My oncologist made some changes in the way it was administered and I got an extra amount of fluids as part of the treatment. Monday night was the best first night after chemo that I have had so far. I was able to eat. I did not get any fever or chills and my temperature stayed down within the normal range all night. I was able to sleep and woke up on Tuesday feeling the best I have felt coming off of a chemo treatment. I continue to be thrilled with the way my oncologist and his team are working to make this season as easy and manageable as possible. The nurses who give the treatments are amazing and are really doing all they can to help ensure I go through this as easy as possible.
Tuesday was an okay day. I was very weak. I made it into the office for the morning. I spent time cleaning up my office, things have gotten cluttered over the past few weeks. I had a visit from Rev. Kevin Walden from ABCOPAD. It was a good time of sharing and prayer. Nancy and I had an appointment at 2pm and then I was home taking a nap and working to stay hydrated.
Tuesday evening was probably the low point of my Cancer journey so far. I am not sure why. I was sitting out on my porch in the quiet enjoying the evening watching the birds, rabbits and other wildlife that surrounds my home and all of a sudden I started feeling overwhelmed and tired of this treatment stuff. One moment it was a peaceful evening on the porch…the next the burden of this season felt very real and it was not fun. I sat there for a while in the stillness and quiet and after a while the heaviness of the moment passed and I was able to sit and enjoy my porch once again.
I think these past few weeks have moved so fast and there has been so much that has happened in a short period of time that I have not had the time to really think through what this diagnosis means…I think it caught up with me tonight on the porch.
Right outside my office door there is a bookcase that holds some of the special books God has used to speak into my life over the years. They are there for people to borrow or take. On top of the bookcase sits a special picture. It was given to me by the leadership of Mission Center New Jerusalem in Springfield, MA. It captures the heart and spirit of this congregation and as I was leaving they shared it with me and I have treasured it ever since. The “never give up” spirit is one that fits into my world these days. Even in the darkest of moments there needs to be this attitude and spirit of “never giving up” and being confident that God can and will redeem and transform this season for His honor and glory.
I pray I will have the strength to continue walking this journey in a way that brings honor and glory to God.
Thank you all for your prayers, thoughts and words of encouragement and support.
God is Good All the Time, All the Time God is Good